Kaiba's Apprentice
by Chaos-Magician011
Summary: CHAPTER 3 UP The Yugioh version of "The Apprentice". Kaiba makes everyone do stupid tasks, the fires them! Rated for language.
1. Default Chapter

This is my second attempt at this story, seeing as how my older version got deleted because it was in script. This version is probably not as good as the old one, because I am much better at writing in script stories.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh or The Apprentice or Survivor, or anything associated with them in this fic.

((Anything in Italics is the narrator. Marik is the Yami and Malik is the hikari.))

.....

_Hello. And welcome to an all new episode of The Apprentice. This week, six remain as they compete for the top prize: A spot among the executives of the biggest multi-billion dollar company in the world: the Kaiba Corporation. We now join Mr. Seto Kaiba himself to recap the past weeks episodes. Mr. Kaiba?_

Seto Kaiba was sleeping his desk inside his office. And he was snoring. And drooling on his papers.

_Um...Mr. Kaiba?_

Kaiba's eye twitched.

_WAKE UP DAMMIT!!!!!_

Kaiba screamed. "EVIL PANDAS!!!!" Kaiba woke up with a start. A very big start. A start so big he fell off his chair. "Wha?!? Oh!" Kaiba mumbled as he pulled himself back onto the chair. "Yes. I'm Seto Kaiba. And we now have six remaining contestants. They are: Yami...Uh...Yami; 5000 year old Pharaoh from Egypt.

Joey Wheeler; 16 year old student from Domino.

Ishizu Ishtar; 20 year old Egyptian government senator-lady from Egypt.

Marik Ishtar; 16 year old student from Egypt.

Tea Gardner; 16 year old student from Domino.

And Maximillion Pegasus, 22 year old creator of Duel monsters from...uh....well, he's from somewhere. And that's all six remaining contestants."

_you're gonna hire a 16 year old student?_

"Actually I was gonna go with the 20 year old government lady."

_Wait a minute...aren't you a 16 year old student?_

Kaiba's face got red. "Uh...Anyways...

((Cooperate Meeting Room))

Yami sighed and banged his head on the table. "Why are we here again?"

Joey grinned. "For the food!"

Marik laughed. "No you pathetic mortal! We're here from world domination! MWAHAHAHA!!!!"

"How is this going to get you world domination Marik?" Tea asked.

Marik scratched his head. "Ummm.... I haven't exactly figured that part out yet."

Just then, Kaiba walked in and took his place at the head of the table. "No free food, Wheeler."

"Dammit!!"

Kaiba took out his briefcase and shuffled through the papers inside. "Your first assignment is to..."

As Kaiba droned on and on, Joey turned to Yami. "Hey Yami, Did you ever notice that if you take the 'Ignment' out of 'assignment' it spells-"

Kaiba cleared his throat. "I hope I wasn't interrupting your conversation with Yami, Wheeler, seeing as how it was so important you had to say it while I was still talking."

Joey blinked. "Wha...? Oh no. I was done."

Tea and Yami snickered and Kaiba grew red.

Kaiba glared at Joey. "You better watch yourself Wheeler, or you might find yourself in a lot more trouble than you bargained for." Kaiba turned his attention back to the whole table. "As I was saying, You will all be divided into 2 teams of 3 people each. Your job is to sell 20 boxes of women's high-heeled shoes to random people. First team done must report back to me. Losing team gets one member fired." Kaiba paused, then continued. "Oh, and one more thing- It has to be male buyers."

Everyone stared at Kaiba for a moment in silence. Then the room erupted into yells of protests.

"That's insane!! What kind of normal man would high-heeled shoes?!?" Marik was practically jumping up and down.

For once, Yami agreed with Marik. "That's right! And what does this have to do with corporate stuff anyway?"

For the first time, Pegasus joined in on the conversation. "Funny Bunny thinks that everyone should stop fighting and be friends! Isn't that right, Funny Bunny?" Pegasus pulled out a sock puppet from his pocket and put it on his hand. The puppet was pink and had two button eyes and blue floppy ears. Pegasus moved his hand up and down, making the puppet nod. "That's right, Pegasus-boy!" Pegasus said for the puppet in a high-pitched voice.

Everyone blinked, then all at once yelled. "SHUT UP PEGASUS!!!!!"

Pegasus scowled. "You're all big meanies."

Kaiba shook his head, then continued. "Your teams are as follows: Team One: Yami, Tea, and Marik. Team Two: Ishizu, Joey, and Pegasus. GO!!!"

"NO!!!" Everyone yelled in protest.

Kaiba grinned and pressed the radio button on his trench coat. "Guards...?"

Two Kaiba corp. guards immediately burst through the door, and grabbed three people each.

"Toss 'em." Kaiba said, nodding.

The guards carried them to the Kaiba corp. entrance and tossed them out onto the street.

((Outside on the street))

((Team one))

Tea turned to her team members. "I think Yami should be our leader this week."

Marik rolled his eyes. "Sure...always go with the pharaoh..."

Yami's eyes lit up. "Really Tea? Then I accept!"

Marik growled.

Tea glared at Marik. "Got a problem with that Marik?"

Marik kicked a twig under a bush onto the sidewalk, causing a walking pedestrian to trip and fall over the twig. Seeing this, Marik became a little happier, and decided not to argue with Tea....this time, anyway. "No."

Tea smiled. "Good."

Yami remembered their task and frowned. "This is just great! How the heck are we gonna sell 20 boxes of women's shoes to men?!"

Marik shrugged and looked for a bright side, which was very unlike him. "At least there's no time limit...."

Just then, Kaiba opened a window from the Kaiba Corp. building and yelled to them. "Oh yea!! I forgot to tell you only have 30 minutes to do this!!!!" He slammed the window, right on his finger. "OWWW!!!!"

Yami sighed. "This just keeps getting better and better!"

"We might as well get started..." Tea said, shrugging.

((20th Avenue: Team two))

Joey scratched his head. "Alright you guys. Now we have to appoint a leader for this week-"

Ishizu and Pegasus cut him off. "Joey."

Joey grinned and dusted off his hands. "Alright then-WHA?!!? ME???!?! Why'd ya choose me?"

Ishizu racked her brain for an answer. "Um...Because...you're the best leader type!!"

Joey frowned. "I am? Yea...I guess you're right. I am!"

Ishizu turned to Pegasus and whispered to him." Not really. I just figure that if we lose, Kaiba will fire him and not us."

Pegasus made the sock puppet nod. "Good point, Freaky-Egyptian lady."

Ishizu sweat dropped.

Joey rubbed his head. "Anyways, How are we gonna sell 20 boxes in 30 minutes? That's like..." Joey stopped to count on his fingers. "A minute and 50 seconds for each box!

Ishizu sighed. "A minute and 30 seconds Joseph."

"30 seconds? How 30 seconds? 50 is half of 100 isn't it?" He began to count on his fingers again.

"Yes, it is, but there are 60 seconds in a minute."

"...There are?"

"Yes, there are."

Pegasus nodded. "Yup Joey-boy! Freaky Egyptian lady is right! There are 60 seconds in a minute! 60 minutes in an hour! 24 hours in a day! 168 hours in a-"

Ishizu stopped him. "That's enough Pegasus."

Joey shook his head. "Anyway, how are we gonna sell 20 boxes in 30 minutes? Has Kaiba lost it?"

Pegasus made the sock puppet shake its head. "Kaiba-boy has lost it, never found it, never will."

Ishizu ignored Pegasus." If only there was some man who was rich enough to buy all 20 boxes at once...some one who was insane enough to do that...."

Meanwhile, Pegasus was busy searching for four-leaf clovers.

Joey and Ishizu looked at Pegasus and thought for a moment.

Pegasus noticed them and looked up. "Why are you guys staring at me? Is something on my face?

Joey and Ishizu looked at each other and grinned. "Pegasus!"

((Team one-15 minutes remaining Boxes sold: 0))

"Would you like to buy some...uh...men's shoes?" Yami said to a complete stranger.

The stranger noticed the boxes that were lying on the ground next to them, then looked inside and frowned. "How are those men's shoes?"

Marik answered for Yami. "You can...uh....use them for bowls!"

"Bowls?" The stranger and Yami asked curiously.

Marik nodded. "Yea! You fill the shoe with food and eat out of them!"

Tea's face was twisted into an expression of half-horror, and half-disgust. "That's disgusting!"

The stranger took out his wallet. "I'll take four boxes!"

Yami and Tea's eyes grew wide. "Four boxes?!!?"

The stranger nodded. "Yea! That's totally retro! And right now retro is in! Besides, me and my wife have been looking for new bowls for our family, and these are awesome!!"

"That'll be 20 bucks." Marik said, holding out his hand.

The stranger set a 20 dollar bill into Marik's hand and picked up the boxes. "It's worth every penny!" He called over his shoulder as he walked away.

Marik beamed. "Told you it'll work!! Ha! I have all the best ideas!"

Tea shook her head as Yami slapped his forehead.

"Well, don't just stand there! We still need to sell 16 more boxes! Move it people!" Marik blew a whistle into Yami's ear.

"Remind me to kill Malik later for giving Marik that whistle." Yami said to Tea, rubbing his ear.

((Team two-10 minutes remaining Boxes sold: 20))

Joey grinned. "That was too easy! Looks like we're all safe this week! We can't be fired!"

"Speak for yourself! That's only one week we're safe, and I'm out 100 bucks!" Pegasus sulked.

Joey shrugged. "Ehh.... You've got a billion more. You'll live."

Ishizu looked up from the pile of money she was counting. "Wait. First we have to go to Kaiba and tell him we've completed his idiotic task."

Joey was impatient. "So lets' go already!"

((Team one-3 minutes remaining Boxes sold: 19))

Yami shook in head in shame. "I can't believe we sold 19 boxes by telling people that they're a new kind of bowl...More importantly...I can't believe Marik's plan worked...."

"Told ya!" Came the response.

Tea frowned as she looked at the final box. "Guys! We've only have to sell one more box, but we only have 3 minutes! We have to find someone...now!!"

"Okay..." Yami looked around until he saw someone standing on the corner of the street. Picking up a box, Yami approached the stranger.

"Hello. Would you like to buy a box of...um...new and so-totally-horrifyingly-out-of -style-that-they're-retro bowls?"

"Sure! I'll take one box!"

Yami was shocked. "Really? That was easy!"

Marik scribbled something on a piece of paper, and then looked up. "Perfect! That'll be 5 dollars!"

The stranger handed Marik 5 singles.

"Thank you sir!" Yami smiled as he handed the man the last box.

The stranger looked at him oddly. "Oh...I'm not a man." The stranger started down the block.

Everyone's mouth dropped open. "WHAT?!?!"

"Hey!! Wait a minute...uh Lady?" Yami called after the...um...person, but he/she were already gone. Yami groaned.

"This is just great! Kaiba said they all had to be male buyers!"

Tea nodded and grimaced. "And we can't sell anymore-we only have 57 seconds left!"

"And even if we had more time, we don't have any more boxes to sell." Marik said as he banged his fist on a nearby tree.

Yami turned to his teammates. "We'll just have to go to Kaiba and tell him that we sold them all to males."

"But we can't! What if Kaiba has security cameras and saw who we sold the last one to?"

Yami turned towards the street. "We'll just have to take that chance! Come on!" Yami started to walk towards the Kaiba Corp. building, and then broke into a run.

Marik and Tea scurried after him. "Hey wait for us!" Marik said as he stuck out his foot, intentionally tripping Tea. "Urm...Wait for me!"

((Kaiba Corp. /Kaiba's Door))

Joey stood at Kaiba's office door and grinned. "Hey you guys! Looks like we're the first ones here!"

Marik stepped into the hallway, followed by Yami and Tea. "Ha! That's what you think!" He sneered.

Ishizu scowled. "Damn. Marik and the rest of the others."

"We sold all 20 boxes! How many did you sell?" Tea jabbed her finger on Joey's forehead, but it was Pegasus who answered her.

"Well, it just so happens that we sold all 20, Tea-boy!"

Tea blinked. "I'm a girl!"

Joey and Pegasus blinked. "You are?!?"

"Alright! Enough blinking already! And it doesn't matter how many you sold, because we got here first." Ishizu poked a finger into Marik's arm.

Yami turned his head to one side. "Do you people enjoy poking or something? Cuz I don't understand what's..."

Pegasus shrugged. "Maybe it's a girl thing."

".....Tea's a girl?"

_And back to the Ishtars...who are still fighting over who got here first. So they're still fighting. What else is new? While we're waiting has anyone seen my sock? I'm missing one._

Pegasus whistled and stuffed his hand into his pocket.

_Anyways...back to the Ishtars._

"It doesn't matter who came first Ishizu! Marik said. Kaiba said first one to him was the winner, not first one to his door! His door isn't him!"

"Quite frankly...I don't see a difference." Joey responded.

"SHUT UP JOEY!!!!!" Everyone shouted at the blonde.

"Jeez...can't a guy even make a statement around her anymore?...."

"Your right Marik. Kaiba did say first one to him wins. And since this isn't the door..." Ishizu's voice trailed off.

..._Silence_

"Must you narrate the 'silence' part?!?" Tea said out loud.

_Hey...I'm the narrator! I only narrate what needs to be said!_

"Whatever."

_Anyways....back to what I was saying- Silence._

Ishizu and Marik looked at each other in silence. Then-at the exact same time- they both grabbed the doorknob. Unfortunately, on the other side of the door, so did Kaiba. Kaiba pulled the door open a second before the Ishtars did, causing a three-way collision.

"OWWW!!!"

"Ouch that's gotta hurt." Joey grimaced.

"Yes...but not as much as what Kaiba's gonna do when he realizes what happened."

"True enough, Yugi. True enough..."

Kaiba turned red and stood up, facing Marik. "WHAT THE-!"

---We interrupt this program to bring you this special news bulletin: Police arrested a teenager today around noon. The teen's name was Tristan Taylor, and he was apparently trying to smuggle 348 boxes of super-hold-hair-gel out of a local Wal-Mart. Details at noon. We now return to your regularly scheduled program.---

"DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!?"

"Um...yes...."Marik stuttered.

"Actually Kaiba, Ishizu was the one who crashed into you. Not Marik." Yami pointed out to Kaiba.

Ishizu slammed her foot down on Yami's. "Why'd you say that for?!"

"OW!!!!! SORRY! SORRY!!" Yami sat down on the floor and rubbed his foot.

Kaiba turned his head to one side. "She did? Oh. Then everything I just said to Marik was directed to Ishizu."

"Are you even gonna apologize to Me for yelling at me when it was Ishizu-..."

"I DON'T APOLOGIZE!!!!!!!!"

Everyone took a step backwards. "Um...Okay..."

Kaiba: Well then, back to business. Which team got here first?

"We did!!" Everyone shouted at him.

"That must mean you all got here at the same time...hmmm...I guess there's only one thing to do..."Kaiba left the room and came back in a few seconds later holding a T.V.

"Watch television?" Joey said, eyeing the T.V.

"Wrong, you nutcracker. I'm going to watch the video of each team's job and see which one played by the rules the most."

"What?!!? NO!!!"

Kaiba switched the TV on and watched Team Two's videotape of Pegasus buying all the boxes.

"Wait, we can explain-!!!" Ishizu started. But Kaiba cut him off.

"Team two is disqualified!!"

Marik stuck out his tongue at Ishizu. "In your face, sister!!"

Joey slammed his fist onto the table. "That's not fair! You didn't watch their tape! They might have cheated too!"

"No!!!!" Team one protested.

Kaiba watched Team Two's video tape, then turned to Team Two. "Well then...you're both disqualified!"

Just then, two Kaiba Corp. guards entered the room. They walked towards Kaiba and whispered something into his ear, then left.

"Um...I've just been informed that I can't disqualify both teams; cuz then the ratings would go down. So...I'll have to decide which team wins my self."

Both teams looked at each other uneasily. "Okay..."

Kaiba sat at the table and thought quietly for a few seconds.

Joey rolled his eyes. "This is taking forever..."

"....Team two wins."

Joey jumped up and grinned. "Alright!!"

Tea jumped up in protest. "What?!? No fair! Why'd they win?!?"

Kaiba smirked. "It was quiet simple, actually. Although I did say that it had to be male buyers, I never said that it couldn't be a male member of the team. And, since Pegasus is male, Team two did no wrong. Team one, on the other hand, did exactly the opposite of what I told them to, which is sell to a woman."

Team one groaned as Team Two cheered.

"Now, team two, you're safe this week. Team one, I'll call you back up as soon as I decide who to kill-I mean fire." Kaiba turned and left the room.

Both teams left the room.

Kaiba sat in his office, thinking about who to fire.

_Mr. Kaiba is now thinking._

Kaiba glared at the camera. "Can you go away? I'm thinking right now."

_Mr. Kaiba now wants us to leave._

Kaiba slammed his pen on the desk. "Get out!!!"

_Mr. Kaiba is now yelling at us to get out._

Kaiba took a deep breath.. "I'm getting annoyed!"

_Mr. Kaiba is now getting a little annoyed._

"A LITTLE?!? GOOD BYE!!!!" Kaiba fumed.

_And we'll take a short commercial break._

Kaiba continued to think.

((Commercial Ends))

_And we're back. Back to what I was doing before-ARE YOU DONE YET?!?_

Kaiba slammed his fist on the desk. "That's it! GUARDS!!!!!"

_Alright, alright. Pushy, pushy..._

After a few minutes, Kaiba stopped thinking and wrote a name down on a piece of paper. Holding the paper up for the camera to see, he explained. "The reason I'm firing you this week is because you showed no help to your team in any way. I'm sorry I have to do this. Wait...no I'm not." He folded the paper in half and put it inside a jar, the covered it.

((board room))

Tea looked at Yami. "So...which one of us do you think will get fired?"

"I don't know."

Marik narrowed his eyes at Yami. "I hope it's you."

"Well...I-" Yami started.

Kaiba walked in. "I hope it's not me." He said as he sat at the head of the table.

Yami rolled his eyes. "You're the host!!! You can't be fired!!!"

Kaiba thought for a second. "Oh yea. Anyways. I've decided which one of you is being voted-uh, fired this week. I'll tally the votes-er, I'll tally my vote."

Kaiba left the room, then returned a moment later carrying the jar that held his vote. He sat the jar on the table. "First, I'll tell you the one person who is safe this week."

"And I think we all know who that is." Yami mumbled, half out-loud and half to himself.

Marik grinned. "Yes...We do indeed."

Kaiba ignored them. "The person who is safe is the one person who played by the rules. That person showed that they have real creativity and superb business skills. That person is Marik."

Yami laughed. "Ha ha! You-"He paused, finally realizing what Kaiba had said. "WHAT?!!? MARIK?!!?"

Marik laughed right back at him. "Ha ha to you Yami!! Baka pharaoh!!"

"Baka-sama to you!"

Marik blinked. "That makes no sense!"

Tea ended their argument. "Would both of you shut up already?" She turned back to Kaiba. "So Marik's safe. Which one of us is fired?"

Kaiba rolled his eyes.: "I'm getting to that!!" He took the paper out of the jar and looked at it. "The person eliminated today is...." He stopped to turn the paper around so everyone could see it. "Tea."

Yami jumped out of his chair. "YAHOO!!! I mean, sorry, Tea." He said, sitting back down and crossing his legs.

Tea turned to Kaiba. "That's not fair!"

Kaiba sneered. "Yes it is! And...I love this part... YOU'RE FIRED!!!"

"No fair!!!" Tea protested.

"Yes, fair!" Kaiba argued back.

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!!!"

"Yes!!!"

Yami sweat dropped. "Can't you both stop arguing and act your age?"

Tea and Kaiba both stopped arguing, and looked at Yami. "NO!!!!" They both yelled at the same time, then continued to yell at each other.

......

Review if ya liked it, or if you have any suggestions!


	2. Selling cookies

I know...This is a short chapter, considering it took me almost a month to finish it...;

Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh or The Apprentice.

**((Board Room))**

"Alright! I've called you all here today to give you your next job! Teams, select another leader, and head to the front hall!" Kaiba stood in front everyone wearily. _"Great." _Kaiba thought. _"Another day with these idiots!"_

"I didn't know there was a front hall..." Joey shrugged at Yami.

"JUST GO!!!" Kaiba snapped his briefcase shut and marched out of the board room with out another word.

**((Front Hall))**

"Who should our leader be this week?" Ishizu looked around at her team mates. Then sighed. A teen who didn't know that there were 30 seconds in a minute and a man that talked to socks. Great.

Pegasus grinned and pulled out his sock puppet. "I think I should! With my leadership skills, and Funny Bunny's humor, we're sure to be the perfect leaders for this team!"

"...No."

"You freaky-Egyptian people spoil all the fun..."

"WE'RE NOT FREAKY!!!!!!!!"

Ishizu grabbed a paper bag from her pocket and began to breathe into in.

"Do you always carry that with you?" Joey asked.

"Living with Marik....wouldn't you?"

"...Good point."

Ishizu stopped hyperventilating and put the bag back in her pocket. "Since Joey was leader last week, I'll be leader this week."

"Fine with me."

**((Team One))**

"I should be leader!"

Marik snorted. "I should!"

"That would be like handing over the world on a silver plate!"

"Its platter, you idiot! Silver platter!!"

"I can say whatever I want to because I rule Egypt! And I say I should be leader!"

"Correction, you idiot-used to rule Egypt. And no! I should!"

"I have an idea! We'll both do rock, paper, scissors to see who should be leader!"

"Fine! One..."

"Two..."

"Three!"

Both of them held out their hand. Yami had scissors, while Marik had selected paper.

Yami stuck out his tongue at Marik. "Aha! I win!!"

"Um...no you don't!"

Yami's expression is better described with keyboard characters: (:/) "Yes I do! Scissors beats paper!...right?"

"Um....no it doesn't."

"Scissors cut paper!"

"Yea, but then the two halves of paper come back and wrap around the scissors, making it unusable!"

Yami's blank stare said it all. "What are you talking about?!?"

Marik nodded. "It's true! It's in the rule book!" He held up a book, or better described as what looked like a 'book report'. It was a couple of pieces of loose-leaf paper held together by two sheets of colored construction paper.

"Let me see that." Yami grabbed the book out of Marik's hands and opened it.

The title of the book was: '_Rock, Paper, Scissors...How to Beat Your Friends Every Time'_! By Marik Ishtar. It was scribbled on the cover of the book in purple crayon.

Yami opened the book and began to read it. Once he finished, he closed the book, oblivious to the fact that the book was a fake.

Marik beamed happily. "It's all in there!"

"Well...if it's in the rules..."

"So I win?" Marik twiddled his thumbs, his voice drowning in innocence.

"I guess so..."

Marik clasped his hand together in glee. "Yes!" He coughed. "Idiot!"

"Bless you."

Marik frowned. "Wha...oh yea! Right! I sneezed....you idiot."

Kaiba entered the front hall, carrying his trademark briefcase. "All right! Now that we're all here, I'll give you your next assignment."

"Why couldn't you just give it to us when we were in the board-" Joey started.

"BECAUSE I'M IN CHARGE AND I SAID SO!!!!"

"...um...okay..." Everyone took a step back, away from Kaiba.

Kaiba cleared his throat. "Anyways...your assignment this week...You have to go door-to-door selling boxes of cookies. Team that sells the most in 1 hour wins. GO!!"

Everyone was silent for a moment, then the room broke out into shrieks of protest.

"Are you serious?!?"

"How old do you think we are?!?"

"What does this have to do with anything?!?"

"Who ate my doughnut?!?"

Everyone was quiet after the last statement, and turned to the person who it came from.

Joey shrugged innocently. "What? Somebody ate my doughnut and you were all asking questions and stuff so..."

Kaiba shook his head. "Whatever! Go!"

"No!" Everyone objected.

"Yes!" Kaiba

"No!!!!"

Kaiba grinned evilly. "GUARDS?!?"

"Alright! We're going, we're going!" Joey put his hands up defensively.

Yami slid off his chair, ready to run from the guards, if necessary. "Just don't throw us outside again!"

Marik jumped up so suddenly that his chair toppled backwards, right onto Yami's foot. "I still have a bruise on my arm that looks like Noah Kaiba!"

Everyone turned to look at Marik. "What?!?"

Marik: "What? I do! See?" He rolled up a sleeve, revealing a nasty purple bruise just below his elbow.

"Eww..." Everyone groaned.

"Looks more like Tristan to me-" Pegasus said through his sock puppet.

Kaiba's face looked as green as Noah's hair. "Okay! Okay! Just get out!"

**((Outside))**

**((Team One)) Time remaining: 58 min. Cookies sold: 0 boxes**

Marik and Yami walked down the street, wondering where they should go first.

"Where should we go first?" Yami asked his partner.

"I don't know." Came the response. "First house we see, I guess."

They continued on in silence for a few moments, before spotting a house.

"I'll ring the doorbell!" Yami raced up the front steps and Marik followed after.

_Ding –Dong!_

After a few seconds, the door swung open, revealing a very surprised teen. Tristan Taylor. But before he could say anything to the two, Marik beat him to it.

"Tristan? You live here?" Marik sputtered.

"I think so..."Tristan stepped outside to look at the address, and a look of relief crossed his face. "Phew! I was afraid I went into the wrong house again!"

"What do you mean 'again'?" Marik frowned. "Tristan, how can go into the wrong house?"

"Well, the old man who lived in that house was so nice...she reminded me of my mom..."

"You thought that an old man was your mother?" Yami interrupted.

"Well...It was an easy mistake! Anyone would have made it!"

"...I-" Marik started.

"Hey Marik, that bruise on your arm looks just like me!" Tristan grinned, pointing at the spirit's bruise.

Marik squinted. "I thought it looked like Noah Kaiba..."

Tristan turned his head to one side, and stared at the bruise for a long time. "...Yea! It does, actually!"

"I thought so!" Marik grinned.

Yami's vein popped. "Marik! Stay on topic!" Turning to Tristan, he frowned. "Do you want to buy some cookies?" He asked bitterly.

Tristan scratched his head. "Actually, I'm on a diet and-"

"BUY THE DAMN COOKIES!!!!!!!" Yami exploded.

"Um...I'll take 5 boxes..." He slowly inched away from the explosive Egyptian.

"JUST 5?!?!?"

"10! I'll take 10 boxes!!"

"THAT'S MORE LIKE IT!!!!" Yami screeched. Then, he returned to normal. "Now, will that be cash or charge?"

Tristan fell over.

**((Team Two)) Time remaining: 30 min. Cookies sold: 3 boxes**

Ishizu looked up from the calculator she was working with and frowned. "We only have a half an hour left!"

"And we only sold 3 boxes of cookies!!" Pegasus whined.

Joey frowned. "Not really. We only sold two. One was stolen and the other one...well, the only reason we sold that one was because we sold it to a bald guy and we told him the cookies would make his hair grow back."

Ishizu scratched her head. "Still, he counts."

"Fine. 2 boxes sold."

Pegasus pulled out his sock puppet. "I still never found that four-leaf clover..." He walked over to nearby tree and began searching.

Ishizu sighed. "Okay Joey. I guess it's up to you and me!"

Joey stood in the middle of the sidewalk, balancing one of the cookie boxes on his head. "Hey Ishizu look what I can do!" The box fell off his head, smashing its contents. "Oops..."

"Okay...I guess I'll do it myself..."

**((Team one)) Time remaining: 20 min. Boxes sold: 10**

**((House #2))**

Marik rang the door bell on their second house.

Ryou Bakura frowned when he opened the door and saw Marik standing there. "Um...Hello Marik...what do you want?"

Marik cleared his throat and read from an index card that Yami had given him. "Hello Sir or Madam, would you like to buy some cookies? Hold out box. Hold out box? Oh!" He held out the box he carried in his other hand.

Yami smacked his forehead. "Argh! Idiot!!"

Ryou turned to Yami, grinning. "Hi Yami. What are you doing here?"

"We're all competing in a game show for a spot as Kaiba's apprentice."

"...Why would you wanna work for Kaiba?"

Yami paused, thinking. "I have no idea. I'm out of here!" He turned around and started to walk down the front stairs.

Three Kaiba Corporation guards suddenly appeared. They stood in front of Yami, blocking his path. "No you're not!" They said.

"And why not?!?" Yami protested.

The Guards whispered something into Yami's ear, and then pushed him in the direction of the stairs. Yami's face was all red as he walked back up the stairs to Ryou's stairs. The Kaiba Corp. guards then turned and left, talking into their walkie-talkies.

Marik and Ryou looked at each other.

"What was that all about, Yami?" His partner said.

Yami shook his head. "Two words: Blackmail"

Ryou frowned. "Isn't that one word?"

Yami thought for a moment. "I dunno..." He turned to Ryou. "So you wanna buy some cookies or not?"

Ryou shrugged. "Sure. I'll take 2 boxes."

"Thanks!"

**((Team Two)) Time remaining: 10 min. Boxes sold: 2**

Ishizu groaned. "It's been 20 minutes and we haven't sold anymore boxes!"

Joey agreed. "I know. Kaiba should have given us something easier to sell to people."

"Like what?"

"Glow-in-the-dark underwear."

"Glow-in-the-dark underwear?!" Ishizu shrieked, her eyes wide.

Joey smiled. "Yea! Some people might not like cookies, or they can be allergic. But who doesn't use glow-in-the-dark underwear?"

"Joey, I don't use-" Her voice trailed off. Then, thinking better of it, continued her sentence. "You're right. Who doesn't like glowing underwear?"

"Told ya."

Pegasus the came out from behind a tree wearing a crown made of four-leaf clovers. "Hey guys! Look what I found! There's a whole bunch of clovers behind that tree!"

Ishizu slapped her hand on her forehead. "I hope Kaiba fires me..."

Yami and Marik turned the corner, approaching the Kaiba Corp. front entrance. Spotting Ishizu, Marik walked up to her, but before he could say anything, she did.

"How many boxes did you sell, Marik?"

"12." He said, shrugging. "How about you?"

Before she could answer, Kaiba opened his office window and shouted down the street, "TIMES UP!!!!!!!!"

"Kaiba! We're right here!" Joey said looking up, shielding his eyes against the sun with his hand. "Why are you yelling?!?"

Kaiba looked down. "What? Oh. Well, times up." He slammed the window shut, the after a few seconds, opened it again. "Did you guys see that? I didn't close the window on my finger this time!" He slammed the window shut, crushing his finger as he did so. Even through the closed window, his curses and screaming could still be heard.

Marik rolled his eyes. "So? How many Ishizu?"

Kaiba opened the window one last time. He stuck his head out; his finger lodged in his mouth. "Boardroom! NOW!!!"

**((Boardroom))**

Kaiba slammed his briefcase on the desk and turned to Yami. "Alright Team one! How many boxes did you sell?"

"What the Hell does he keep in that damn suitcase?!?!" Joey whispered to Yami. "He carries it around like he super-glued his hand to it!"

Yami shrugged and frowned. "He probably locked his kindness inside-"

"I SAID- 'TEAM ONE! HOM MANY BOXES DID YOU SELL?!?!'" Kaiba wasn't in a good mood, but then again when was he ever?

"12, Kaiba." Yami retorted.

"And Team two?"

Ishizu coughed. "2."

"Then Team One wins."

Yami jumped up. "We won!!"

"And it was all thanks to my leader ship skills!" Marik boasted.

Yami shook his head. "I'm gonna save my energy and not answer that one."

Kaiba: "So team two loses...which means one of you is going home. Pegasus, you're fired."

Pegasus: "What? Me?!?!"

"Yes you! Now get out!" Kaiba said, booting up his laptop.

Ishizu rolled her head to one side. "You're not even gonna call a boardroom meeting for us?"

"No. I wanted Pegasus out from the start. But then team one lost last week...so I couldn't fire him."

"So Pegasus being fired has nothing to do with how he sold cookies?" Joey queried.

"Not really."

"...Works for me!"

Ishizu smacked her forehead. "Why did Pegasus have to go? WHY?!?"

"Why Ishizu? You wanted him to stay?" Marik smirked.

Ishizu gagged. "No! I wanted to be fired! I'm sick of this game!"

........

That's all for this chapter. Please R&R! And you can you can also tell me who'd like voted out next, if you'd like.


	3. Selling Glowinthedark underwear

Chapter 3!!! throws confetti -;; heh...it only took me almost a month...over a month...but that's not the point..-;; Urm...yea...I'll say this again, even though I already said it in chapter one- Don't mind my horrible paragraph-arrangement. I'm horrible at it. Just pretend that it's normal and you should be fine. Also, don't mind my spelling. I just realized now that I spelled 'corporate' like 'cooperate' back in chapter one...ya. I'm a really bad speller. .;;

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Yugioh. (Duh.) Same goes for The Apprentice, Game boy, EBay, Burger King, and other random things you may notice in the ficcy.

Oh, and thanks to all who reviewed!

-----

**Week 3**

The remaining four contestants all sat around the Kaiba Corp. lobby, talking to their partners, and wondering aloud what the next task would be. Or at least team two was. Team one was sitting across the room from each other, shooting random glares at their teammates. Marik was laying on one of the leather chairs, while Yami was busy applying more hair gel to his spikey hair. Kaiba was sitting in his office, which was located right next from where Marik was laying. The door to the office was wide open, so Marik could hear every click Kaiba made as he typed on his computer. The secretary's desk was across the hallway, near where Ishizu and Joey sat quietly talking. Or at least one of them was talking quietly. Ishizu would whisper something to Joey, who would then reply loudly, so unless you were Joey, you only heard half the conversation. Quite strange, if you've never hung out with Joey before.

"Pharaoh! They should make a law saying you're only allowed six cases of hair gel a week, because looking at you're head, you're way over the six-case mark!" Marik said, as he watched Yami toss an empty jar of gel into the garbage, then take out another one from his pocket and apply some more to his hair.

"Look who's talking! Your hair look's like you hung upside down on some monkey bars for four hours! And besides, this is only my fourth case....today..."

Marik was just about to respond to that when the clicking sound from Kaiba's office stopped. Marik heard Kaiba whisper something into his intercom, and then the clicking resumed. A few seconds later, the secretary got up from her desk and walked over to the two teams.

"Mr. Kaiba will see you now." She smiled and walked back to her desk. Marik was fuming.

"What?!?! He's so lazy that he can't get up from his desk for two seconds to come over here and tell us that himself?!?! I mean, c'mon! His office is right here!!

"You're exactly right Marik. My office is right here. Which is why I can hear everything you're saying." Kaiba said, getting up from his desk and walking into the lobby.

"Good! So now I don't have to repeat it to your face!"

Before a fight broke out, Ishizu interrupted. "Just get it out. What's our next task?" She questioned.

Kaiba looked at all of them and smirked. "Why the long faces? You're all competing for a chance to work for _me. _You all should look ecstatic!

Yami frowned. "Well when you put it that way..." He grabbed a mallet from out of nowhere and swung it down hard on Kaiba's head. "No!"

Kaiba looked dazed for a moment, then fainted. Everyone was quiet for a moment, and then the screaming started.

"You Baka pharaoh!!! What's wrong with you?!?! Marik screeched.

"Yea, Yug. What was that all about? Though I can't say I blame you for doing that..." Joey smirked. Ishizu sighed.

"I predict problems...."

Just then, Malik ran through the door, and stopped right in front of everyone. He pulled out a piece of paper, and then began to read.

"I've just been informed that Mr. Kaiba was hit on the head by a gigantic hammer-"

"Mallet!" Marik coughed as Yami scowled.

"Oh sorry. MALLET."

_silence_

"Again with the silence thing?!?!" Joey shouted.

_Alright! Alright! Just shut up!!_

"Okay....so we know Kaiba was hit over the head." Ishizu said aloud. "What else?"

Malik shrugged. "That's it."

"You idiot! We can see that Kaiba was knocked out! He's right in front of us! Why are you reporting stuff to us that we already know, you brilliant human being?!?!" Marik fumed.

Malik scowled. "Hey! I don't make the news! I just report it!"

"So what does this mean?" Joey thought aloud.

Malik shrugged. "I guess the show's canceled." He turned to walk away, but he was stopped by two Kaiba Corp. guards who whispered something into his ear, then turned and left.

Malik cleared his throat. "I've just been informed that the show isn't cancelled, because then the ratings will go down. This means we must find a replacement." He nodded at Ishizu, and ran off.

"Who could we find on such short notice?" Yami wondered.

**((10 minutes later))**

"So...let me get this straight. My brother was hit on the head with a giant...erm...was it a hammer?" Mokuba Kaiba frowned and looked up from the Game boy he was playing with.

"It was a mallet." Marik smirked.

"Oh, sorry. Mallet." Mokuba looked back down at the Game boy screen and continued to play. "And you want me to be the host for this week?"

"You're the only one who's related to Kaiba." Joey said.

"I...guess I could do that. How hard could it be?" Mokuba switched the Game boy off and looked at everyone.

_Si-_

"Don't start with the silence thing again!!!" Joey shouted.

_Oh...Fine!!!!_

After a few minutes of NOT TALKING (Joey grinned.), Mokuba spoke up.

"So....what are you guys waiting for?"

Yami slapped his forehead. "For you to give us our next task!"

"Oh!! But I don't have anything for you to sell...Anyone got any ideas?"

Joey grinned. "Glow-in-the-dark underwear!"

Marik, Yami and Ishizu looked at him. "NO!!!!!"

Mokuba grinned. "I like it!!"

"WHAT?!?!?" Everyone but Joey shouted.

"Ya! Who doesn't like Glow-in-the-Underwear?"

"My thoughts exactly!" Joey smirked.

Mokuba jumped off the chair he was sitting on. "So...um...Let's see...Where do I get glowing underwear for you guys to sell?"

"Internet?" Someone suggested.

Mokuba shrugged. "It's worth a try."

**((Somewhere in the Kaiba's house))**

Mokuba opened his laptop and turned it on. He entered the internet, and turned to everyone else. "What website should we try?"

"EBay!! They have all the best stuff!!!" Joey jumped up and down like a little kid.

Yami frowned. "How do you know about EBay, Joey?"

"It's where I get all my Yuugioh Subs!"

"Um...And why would you do that?"

"Hey. _Someone_ has to see us they way we were meant to be."

"...True."

"Ah! Here it is! I found it!" Mokuba grinned triumphantly. "EBay had them! There are currently 20 pairs left! Should I buy all of them?"

"That means there are 10 pairs for each team. Yes, buy them all." Ishizu said.

"Okay." Mokuba clicked the 'order' button, and charged it to Kaiba's credit account.

"Kaiba's not gonna be happy when he finds out what you did while he's unconscious." Marik taunted.

"Then we won't _let _him find out, right...Marik?" Mokuba glared at the spirit, and held up an envelope. Marik glared at Mokuba and snatched the envelope and looked through its contents. Gasping, Marik threw the envelope down in horror. Mokuba grabbed them before Marik could, and smirked. Marik was horrified.

"You...You Demon child!!!"

"Heh." Mokuba turned back to the computer and turned it off. A second after he did so, the door bell rang.

"That was quick." Mokuba thought, as he headed to the front door and answered it. A post-office worker stood there with a medium-sized box in his hands. "Package for Mr. Kaiba?"

"That's me." Mokuba smiled and grabbed the clipboard. He signed his brother's name, and handed it back to the officer. The officer handed him the box, and left.

"I got it guys!" Mokuba called as he shut the door. While he waited for everyone to come back into the lobby, he noticed that Seto was still on the floor, unconscious. But just as Mokuba was walking by, Kaiba lifted his head, and struggled to his feet

"Oh...my head..."

_WHAM!!_

Mokuba lifted the box over his head and slammed it down on Kaiba, who was immediately knocked out once again.

"Oh...pretty birdies..." Kaiba fell back down.

Mokuba smiled sympathetically. "Sorry Seto. But I like being in charge for once!" And with that, he ran off to find the rest of the contestants.

**((Team One-15 minutes later-Outside))**

"You were leader last time, Pharaoh!"

"So? I was a better leader than you would have been!"

"Sure! If you mean 'Leader of the morons'!"

Yami and Marik were standing outside, and once again, they were fighting over who would get to be leader.

Yami sighed. "Fine. I have an idea. We'll duel to see who the leader will be."

"Fine with me. I'll crush you!"

Yami and Marik took their places opposite one another in front of the Kaiba Corp. building. Each of them took the duel disks that had just been "conveniently" placed on their arms. They shuffled their decks, and drew.

"I'll go first Pharaoh! First, I'll place one card face down, then summon Helpoemer in defense mode! Turn end!" Marik ended his turn by laughing manically.

"Hmm...Then I'll summon Dark Magician in attack mode! Destroy Hell Poemer! Dark Magic!" Yami watched as his Dark Magician attacked Marik's Hell Poemer. Then he laughed. "With my Dark Magician, I can't lose!"

**((20 minutes later))**

"HOW COULD I LOSE?!?! I HAD MY DARK MAGICIAN!!!!"

Marik laughed manically, and stroked his deck. "Even the king has to step down sometime, pharaoh!"

"Argh! Enough gloating! So you're leader! Big deal!"

"It's a very big deal!"

"Whatever!"

Yami sighed and turned to Marik. "Fine Mr. Leader, what should we do now?"

Marik took out his Millennium Item and scratched his chin with it. "I dunno. How about force-selling? Threaten them?"

"How 'bout no?"

"Spoilsport."

Yami sighed again. "How about we do what we did with the shoes? Be street vendors?"

"....Fine. Have it your way."

"You sound like a Burger King commercial."

"What' Burger King?"

"...Never mind.

Yami looked around for people to sell to. Spotting one, he approached the man. "Would you like to buy some.....uh....glow-in-the-dark underwear?"

The man looked at Yami like he had 3 heads. Then the man walked away. Yami sighed. Marik laughed at Yami.

"You're pathetic!"

"And you're psycho. So what's you're point?"

Yami sighed for the third time this chapter. "This....is gonna take a while."

**((Team Two))**

"Joey, It's your turn to be leader." Ishizu said.

"Hm? Okay." Joey yawned. "So...how are we gonna sell these? Door-to-door?"

Ishizu shrugged. "I guess so. It would probably be the best idea."

((House One))

Ishizu rang the door bell to the first house on the block. Joey stood next to her, holding the small box of glowing underwear.

As soon as the door opened, a short, brown-haired girl opened the door. Ishizu's jaw dropped.

"Serenity?!?"

Serenity smiled. "Hi Ishizu! Hi Oniichan!"

Ishizu smiled at Serenity, and then turned to frown at Joey. "You live here?!?"

"Hm? I do?" Joey looked up from the leaf he was examining. He looked at the address and smiled. "Well what do you know!"

Ishizu fell.

"So...Um...guys? Why are you ringing my doorbell carrying a box of glow in the dark underwear?" Serenity asked, confused.

"We're on a game show for Kaiba. And we have to sell all this stuff that he gives us to sell, and whoever sells the most wins." Joey answered.

"So who else is playing?"

"Well....Yami. And Marik too."

"Oh. Well, if I buy some, will you guys win?"

"Yea. If you buy them all."

Serenity looked thoughtful. So....if I buy all of the underwear now, you guys will win Kaiba's challenge?"

Joey smirked. "....Yea...."

Serenity smiled. "Okay Oniichan! I'll but them all!"

Ishizu frowned. "Are you sure Serenity? You want to buy them all? You really don't have to, you know...."

"It's okay Ishizu! I want to!"

Joey grinned. "Really? Thank you Serenity!" He handed the box to Serenity as Serenity forked over twenty dollars.

"It's no problem Joey! I'm just happy to help!"

**((Team One-No Underwear sold))**

"Hello. Would you like to buy some...uh...glowinthedarkunderwear?" Yami finished the last word in one breath as the pedestrian shook his head. Yami sighed as the stranger walked away. "It's useful if you want to get dressed in the dark! ....If you ever wanted to...do that..."

Yami sighed as he walked back to when Marik was sitting, laughing at Yami hysterically.

"You moron! That's the 27th person you've asked, and not even one of them has even bothered to answer you! Not that I would expect them to, but still..."

Yami glared at the spirit. "You think you can do better? Let me see you try!"

Marik stopped laughing and looked at Yami. "Fine! I will!"

Marik walked to the corner, and took out his Millennium Rod. He waited until someone passed by, the held out the Rod right under the man's throat.

"Alright! Unless you want to continue to live the rest of your worthless days in the Shadow Realm, I suggest you do as I say!" Marik commanded.

The man gulped frightfully. "O-okay! W-what is it you w-want from m-me?"

Marik grinned. "I want you to buy a case of glow in the dark underwear!"

"Is that all you-"

"SILENCE!!!! DO AS I SAY!!!"

The man squeaked and hunched over so that he was in a fetal position. "Um...okay...one box?"

"Hm....better make it all of them....ten boxes.

"Okay! Just don't hurt me!!!" The man grabbed his wallet, grabbed his wallet, and took out twenty dollars. Literally throwing the money at Marik, the man grabbed to boxes and ran off screaming. Marik turned back to Yami with a look of triumph on his face. He grinned.

"Pharaoh!! Didn't I tell you that I was superior to you?! You didn't think I can do it, now did you? Proves how smart you Pharaohs are! Have anything to say for your self?...Pharaoh?"

Yami was busy looking over his deck of cards. Once he heard Marik talking to him, he looked up.

"Did you say something, Marik?

**((20 minutes later- Corporate (spelled it right!) Meeting Room))**

"We sold all ten boxes, sister. How many did you sell?"

"Ten."

"What?!? Then which team loses a member?!?"

Once both teams had found out that both of them had sold their ten boxes, everyone went crazy. The pandemonium continued until Mokuba entered the room and sat at the head of the table.

"From what I've heard, both teams sold their ten boxes, correct?" Mokuba asked.

"Yea..." Everyone replied in unison.

"So...I guess that means that two people are leaving today."

"Yea...WHAT?!!?" Everyone screamed at the youngest Kaiba.

"Well yea. It would have had to be done anyways. Or otherwise, next week, it would be two against one. That's uneven.

Everyone sighed, and prepared for the worst.

"So...the two people to be fired this week are-"

Just then, the door flew open, and a very angry looking Seto Kaiba stood in the doorway. Just as the door flew open, thunder and lightning crashed outside. The lights flickered out, the revived. Everyone screamed.

Kaiba stomped over to Mokuba, and turned the younger Kaiba's chair around so that they were face-to-face.

"MOKUBA!!! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!?!? WHY THE HELL DID YOU KNOCK ME BACK OUT USING A CARBOARD BOX?!?! AND YOU HAVE BETTER HAVE A GOOD REASON FOR TAKING OVER MY SHOW!!!!"

"But um...Seto! I made you forty bucks!!" Mokuba tried to get out of Kaiba's wrath. Kaiba's face suddenly softened.

"...Forty?...cash or check?"

Mokuba handed his brother two twenty-dollar bills. Kaiba suddenly became happy.

"Now that's better! Why don't you run along now and play Game Bored or something?"

"You mean Game Boy, Seto?"

"Yea, that. Go play it."

"Okay. Bye guys!" With a wave to Yami and everyone, Mokuba left the room.

"Now...where was Mokuba?" Hm..." Kaiba looked at a piece of paper. "It says here that both teams sold ten boxes of...glow in the dark underwear? I'm not gonna even ask." Kaiba sighed, and looked up from the paper. "So...that means that two of you are fired this week, right? Of course I'm right. So..."

Everyone grimaced.

Kaiba grinned. This was the best part! "Joey, Marik? You're FIRED!!!!"

"What? NO!!!!" Joey shrieked.

"Nooo!!! I'm the darkness!! You can't do this to me!!!!" Marik protested.

"Wanna bet? GUARDS!!!!!" Kaiba smiled evilly as two Kaiba Corp guards came and dragged Joey and Marik away.

"You'll be hearing from my lawyers, Kaiba!!! As...soon as I figure out how to get one!!!" Joey's voice faded as he disappeared from sight.

Kaiba sighed. "Only one more week, that God." He turned to Ishizu and Yami. "Looks like you two are the only ones left. Next week, you'll compete for a spot to work for me."

_You stole my line, KAIBA!!!!_

"Um...you're welcome?"

----

**conan is hiding something- **Maybe there are 3.141592654656547765748765467676746767667654765475766776547654 seconds in a minute. Who knows? And yes, I have no idea what you're talking about. - But what does the WWTKWTBWTKUTGYTSOTS organization stand for?

**creation161- **If that's a complement, then thank you! . And it's nice to be worshipped...I AM great, aren't I? xD :D

**Freak09-** Thank you! And this is the next chapter. xD

**Red Rose Yuki- **Thanks. And I fired Joey, if it makes you happy. .

**Annoying Cheese- **Don't diss the Egyptians! They're cool!

**squeakiemonkey7- **Thank you! And I updated. . (I use too many smilies...o.O...)

Please Review!


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